She's baaaAAAAAck

Okey dokey, let's get this post out of the way. 

Today is one of those days I don't feel like I have the actual time for this, but I've made a commitment to post every day in some capacity this year...even when I say/think/pretend that I can't. 

Get inspired or get discouraged...my choice type shit 🤷🏾‍♀️

Thankful

I thank the earth for its fruits.

I thank the sky for its rain.

I thank the sea for its salt.

I thank the wind for its strength.

I thank the body for its resilience.

I thank the beginning for its potential.

I thank the end for its opportunity.

Yes, i thank even the end.

What would the beginning be without the ultimate culmination of the end.

- Day whatever of "The Magic Words"

I dunno if you've noticed but uuhhh...I've been writing like crazy lately. No rhyme or reason, I think I just enjoy it. I stopped advertising my work on instagram, though. I feel like this is more members only. If you wanna be here, you're here. I don't have enough quality control to be inviting people in here from every part of my life. Some folks don't know me in this cpapcity, CAN'T. It would spoil the mystery of who I am off the clock. Something in my mind thinks I've always gotta keep people guessing in order to appear more interesting than I probably am. Do we all do that becasue of the internet? I've been like this since AOL messenger and dial up...so the internet wasn't my initial motive for mystery but it's definitely giving me a reasonable justification to keep up the ruse lol. I invite my mixed crowd toread my stuff when my day is good, and then I have spans of conspiracy theories and people/things that I can't gripe about aloud and then I look a little...unstable lmao but really I just be having feelings and the spectrum for me is vast. 

Plus, who reads anymore? Scrolling or listening are very passive and convenient. Not to mention, scrolling is popular these days. Reading my online journal? You'd have to want to get to know me. All thing considered, including my conflicting urge to be seen but hidden...I'm just writing my little heart out and whoever is meant to see will read it 🤷🏾‍♀️ my intentions were to filter out my weird stuff but then I realized I had nowhere else to put it. It's also hard for me to judge what's weird to me vs what's weird to the general public lmao 

And also, this is my shit and has been...since MySpace disappeared. In fact, ONLY because MySpace disappeared lol so I'm not filtering myself now because people are here. I do that enough in my real life. Seriously. Anyway, I did my hair this weekend and...sis, I ate that shit tf down🤭

For what it's worth, I noticed I normally have 3 readers...10 now? 

Eboni...my random internet friend: You are my motivation lmao not literally, but I'm writing in hopes to evoke a comment or some sort of interaction from you since you're the most vocal reader I've got over here. I appreciate you 🥰

Heeeyyy! Glad to see you took a break from scrolling haha. Don't be scurred to leave a comment or share with a friend...

It's interesting how repeated interaction can cultivate comfort or familiarity between complete strangers...or at least imaginary comfort. 

Always,

💚deena