Monday

 Today is looking up. I'm out of that weird place of doubt...it happens to the best of us lol 

Today I plan to educate my children on the value of peace and respect others...people, places, and things...

As a mom of brown babies, it's important to educate them at home in addition to whatever they're taught in school. This goes for math, science, literature, history....

I'm not a conspiracy theorist but at some point, in public school, I got a feeling that the standard story was being delivered to me in a way that made me feel okay about what transpired before my existence...

The consistent story ending with "now everything is exactly how Dr. King imagined..." Which I guess one could argue there has been obvious progression but experiencing discrimination by someone who's teaching me it doesn't happen anymore made me think, "Wait a mf minute"🤨🤔

I don't know...some say that kids will adopt and latch onto whatever you highlight as negative. Human behavior is interesting to me. I like to think I'm a self-taught human analyst senior sometimes lol. I like to study the differently dynamics between people with similarities and people with differences. Human connection is the most mysterious energy in my opinion. The mystery being we're allegedly the only animals with such deep-rooted social classifications. I'm interested but not invested lol I mean I haven't thought any deeper into it than that but it's cool though. 

My curiosity comes from always getting asked if I'm black or not. I don't care at this point in my life. I thought it mattered when i was younger because you hear about grants and opportunities that are designs with the intentions of "looking out" for black people.

I can't speak for everyone but in my experience, when I let go of my race being a factor in the level of my success, I went further. I don't care what color I am in the room; I'm still me and I still deserve respect. I don't filter my style, my hair, my anything...even though I was encouraged to code switch by elders and mentors. Fuck that. If everyone else can be authentic, I can too; and will be.

That's what I'm hoping I'm teaching my kids... Speak your mind with some decorum and respect will follow. Never allow yourself to be disrespected or uncomfortable at the expense of the comfort of others. Life is full of opportunities, and we all deserve to show up with our best foot forward.

Like I said, my experiences may be unique, but I think i received what output deserved 9 times out of 10 for sure. 

Thoughts? Be kind, treat others with the same energy you'd want from them. People are mirrors and they reflect what they are shown.

Make sure you come correct, and you'll be aaight🫶🏾

💚deena