Today im extremely irritated...i'm not quite sure why but its been going on for a few weeks now. i think these are symptoms of my winter slump...(Thats what I call it atleast). Basically, when Oct rolls around, my whole dimeanor changes on its own and i begin to feel "out of it" and everyday is a bad day. I tend to find pleasure in complaining about even the happiest of things or i push people out of my life that were once important in my life i guess. I mentioned it to my coworker and she said its a mental health disorder commonly referred to as "SAD" for Seasonal Affective Disorder...and of course my brain was like...yea whatever.but i googled it and it made perfect sense...kinda.but then again, everything makes sense when u google it.?
Anyway, im on a 61-day quest to "fix" my SAD because I'm completely anti-meds when it involves "fixing your feelings". I'm going to start November 1 (in about a week) and continue until the night of Dec 31. When next year comes around, i'll already know how to properly prep myself instead of denying my "disoreder"

I've been researching SAD and found that I'm not alone...SAD affects half a million people every winter between September and April, peaking in December, January, and February and three out of four SAD sufferers are women...(according to Mental Health America)...so as a SAD woman (haha...that sounds so funny to me idk why...) I also found out melatonin, a sleep-related hormone secreted by the pineal gland in the brain, has been linked to SAD. This hormone, which may cause symptoms of depression, is produced at increased levels in the dark. Therefore, when the days are shorter and darker the production of this hormone increases. Soooo...i can either buy 10000 lamps for my porch and living room or maybe i'll just find other ways to stimulate my brain...

Wish me luck...