I'm not sure what week I'm on but this kid is kicking up a storm.
We finally decided on his name, which of course, I'm not mentioning until he hears it first! Call it watcha want but manifesting has got me this far (bigger boobs, rounder butt, a son, a chance to push etc) so I'm convinced in the power of silent manifesting. I'm almost 200lbs now, wheich is neither here nor there...I'm not eating crazy. You cant even tell I'm pregnant from behind...atleast that's what my friends and my man says, I've never looked at myself from behind at this size...that shit's hard to do lol.
My fingers are swelling, my legs are itchy, my psoriasis is living it's best life all over "my neck and my back"( Mike Tyson voice) so I think it's fair to say...the day of arrival is growing near. One thing I can say they don't warm you about is the strong anticipation you have towards the end of the pregnancy. I'm not sure if it's because he's moving around more or because I'm uncomfortably huge but I literally am having a difficult time waiting for him to come out. Cesarean is not in my purview but I've been doing squats like a mad woman, walking for miles, and eating pineapples whole, despite the slight rash it' causing the creases of my lips. Mama wants these contractions to come on sooner than later. I'm sure once the first one hits me, I'll be singing (or screaming) a different tune but for now, bring them on! I'm mentally ready to push and breathe baby! I think I am. I'd like to think I am ready. My only concern these days is wondering where I'll be when nature decides the cake is ready to come out the oven. Will I be at home? Will I be in my car...or at work. If I could rate my least desired place vs the most desired place...least would be in my car, most desired would be at a doc appointment lmao what better place to be than with the bitch trained and certified to getterdone?
I'm excited to nurse this baby and pat the gas out of his belly and watch him struggle to figure out how to fart...so cute! I'm trying to be cautious of exclaiming I "can't wait" because I can and I really want to...I'm just very excited about the experience coming my way.
I knew a year ago that my 28th year of life would be a huge life shift for me, but I didn't quite know how and to what capacity at that time. Jumbo and I went over a couple of difficult hurdles last year. I think maybe we were at one of our lowest points, but the silver lining, there's only one way to go when you're at the bottom...and that's up! I mean I guess...we weren't at the BOTTOM-bottom...but I knew that optimism and thinking ahead would at least help me with my qualms about the whole thing.
No, I didn't manifest another child; but I manifested positivity into my life, peace, a grounded mind, unconditional love, understanding, self reflection, stability, trust, sanity....
Was I granted a son as the solution to all of those things wrapped in one? Or was my son a gift for achieving all of those things? Not sure if the chicken came before the egg on this one but I like chicken...and I like eggs (most of the time lol) and I'm so grateful for the blessing I've been granted and the opportunity to raise a young man. I truly didn't think I was a son-having-mama but now, I don't even know what that means...especially if science is correct in it's theory of the man being responsible for the sex of the baby. Sometimes I've wondered if people are granted a boy or a girl depending on what type of life lessons they need to learn but then again...people with 10 kids, some boys, some girls, may just need to learn how to pull it out or wrap it up lmao just kidding...somewhat.
Not sure where this is going necessarily but I'm feeling good this week, I think I'm 35 weeks in...only 5 more weeks to go? that's crazy. This pregnancy has gone by very quickly. I need to get my house in order, he could be arriving any day now and his crib doesn't have sheets, my tits don't have a pump, I do have some outfits, a car seat, stroller, pacifier, gift cards, diapers, wipes and a laundry basket thanks to a very beautiful shower my mom and sister hosted for me. Very beautiful...I'll have to squeeze in some pictures for ya 😉
So that's that for now... Thanks to those of you reading this thing btw. Reading is fundamental...and hopefully my writing gives you some good vibes...or better vibes than you had before you got here lol
Love ya!
xo deena
We finally decided on his name, which of course, I'm not mentioning until he hears it first! Call it watcha want but manifesting has got me this far (bigger boobs, rounder butt, a son, a chance to push etc) so I'm convinced in the power of silent manifesting. I'm almost 200lbs now, wheich is neither here nor there...I'm not eating crazy. You cant even tell I'm pregnant from behind...atleast that's what my friends and my man says, I've never looked at myself from behind at this size...that shit's hard to do lol.
My fingers are swelling, my legs are itchy, my psoriasis is living it's best life all over "my neck and my back"( Mike Tyson voice) so I think it's fair to say...the day of arrival is growing near. One thing I can say they don't warm you about is the strong anticipation you have towards the end of the pregnancy. I'm not sure if it's because he's moving around more or because I'm uncomfortably huge but I literally am having a difficult time waiting for him to come out. Cesarean is not in my purview but I've been doing squats like a mad woman, walking for miles, and eating pineapples whole, despite the slight rash it' causing the creases of my lips. Mama wants these contractions to come on sooner than later. I'm sure once the first one hits me, I'll be singing (or screaming) a different tune but for now, bring them on! I'm mentally ready to push and breathe baby! I think I am. I'd like to think I am ready. My only concern these days is wondering where I'll be when nature decides the cake is ready to come out the oven. Will I be at home? Will I be in my car...or at work. If I could rate my least desired place vs the most desired place...least would be in my car, most desired would be at a doc appointment lmao what better place to be than with the bitch trained and certified to getterdone?
I'm excited to nurse this baby and pat the gas out of his belly and watch him struggle to figure out how to fart...so cute! I'm trying to be cautious of exclaiming I "can't wait" because I can and I really want to...I'm just very excited about the experience coming my way.
I knew a year ago that my 28th year of life would be a huge life shift for me, but I didn't quite know how and to what capacity at that time. Jumbo and I went over a couple of difficult hurdles last year. I think maybe we were at one of our lowest points, but the silver lining, there's only one way to go when you're at the bottom...and that's up! I mean I guess...we weren't at the BOTTOM-bottom...but I knew that optimism and thinking ahead would at least help me with my qualms about the whole thing.
No, I didn't manifest another child; but I manifested positivity into my life, peace, a grounded mind, unconditional love, understanding, self reflection, stability, trust, sanity....
Was I granted a son as the solution to all of those things wrapped in one? Or was my son a gift for achieving all of those things? Not sure if the chicken came before the egg on this one but I like chicken...and I like eggs (most of the time lol) and I'm so grateful for the blessing I've been granted and the opportunity to raise a young man. I truly didn't think I was a son-having-mama but now, I don't even know what that means...especially if science is correct in it's theory of the man being responsible for the sex of the baby. Sometimes I've wondered if people are granted a boy or a girl depending on what type of life lessons they need to learn but then again...people with 10 kids, some boys, some girls, may just need to learn how to pull it out or wrap it up lmao just kidding...somewhat.
Not sure where this is going necessarily but I'm feeling good this week, I think I'm 35 weeks in...only 5 more weeks to go? that's crazy. This pregnancy has gone by very quickly. I need to get my house in order, he could be arriving any day now and his crib doesn't have sheets, my tits don't have a pump, I do have some outfits, a car seat, stroller, pacifier, gift cards, diapers, wipes and a laundry basket thanks to a very beautiful shower my mom and sister hosted for me. Very beautiful...I'll have to squeeze in some pictures for ya 😉
So that's that for now... Thanks to those of you reading this thing btw. Reading is fundamental...and hopefully my writing gives you some good vibes...or better vibes than you had before you got here lol
Love ya!
xo deena
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